


To Be Loved (And To Be In Love)

by SlimeQueen



Series: Wonderland [2]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Drabble, Implied/Referenced Abuse, M/M, basically chanyeol and baek really loving each other, takes place after ch 16 of orbit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-02
Updated: 2017-06-02
Packaged: 2018-11-08 00:20:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11070129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlimeQueen/pseuds/SlimeQueen
Summary: Chanyeol and Baekhyun and the aftermath of their argument. A little sidestory that takes place in ch 16 of Lost In Your Orbit





	To Be Loved (And To Be In Love)

**Author's Note:**

> wow @myself stop causing baekhyun pain also YES there will be wonderland verse drabbles and sidestories

“Hey, you know I love you, right?”

Baekhyun glances up from his phone and quirks an eyebrow. Chanyeol stands in front of him looking like a chastised little kid, which actually kind of looks funny on his tall stature. He should have expected this. Chanyeol’s always apologizing for things that aren’t his fault, always shouldering blame for things that have nothing to do with him.

“I know,” Baekhyun says slowly. “ _You_ know that I’m not mad at you, right?” He drops the phone and stands up from the couch. He’d hated his height at some point in his life, wearing heavy thick soled shoes to appear just an inch taller, but with Chanyeol, he likes how he has to stand on his tiptoes to reach the younger boy’s mouth.

“Are your knuckles okay?” Baekhyun’s seen Chanyeol throw a punch before—it’s scary how much power he can put behind a hit.

Chanyeol flexes his fingers calculatingly and holds them up so Baekhyun can see the bony ridges of his knuckles. “Sehun already fucked him up enough so I didn’t bother hitting hard.’

Despite himself, Baekhyun’s lips curl at the corners. Sehun had been fucking brilliant, no matter what anyone argues. “He reminds me of myself.”

Chanyeol raises an eyebrow, arms winding around Baekhyun’s waist. “Really? I wouldn’t have thought.”

“I mean…when it comes to economic standing and background, yeah, we’re total opposites, but he’s just another confused lonely kid who’s fiercely loyal. There’s more to him than he lets on.”

Sehun had confided in him once, about struggling through self-discovery. Baekhyun knows how easy it was for Jongin, with his understanding and kind mother, or Chanyeol, who’d always been eager to rebel against his parents, to accept themselves, but Baekhyun and Sehun are of a different breed.

Baekhyun had fought himself the whole way, drowned in self-doubt and shame until he’d worked his way out of it, and he knows how hard it must have been for Sehun, who’d spent his whole life thinking one way to just completely flip himself around.

“It’s interesting. How long do you think they’ll keep fighting before they both realize they care about each other too much to let petty fighting get between them?”

Baekhyun grins. “Give them a week. And make use of that height and carry me to bed.”

Chanyeol grumbles good naturedly, groaning under his weight when Baekhyun winds arms around his shoulders and clings onto him like a koala. His wrist aches dully against the warm skin of Chanyeol’s neck and Baekhyun grimaces into the taller boy’s shoulder. The guy from the party had been holding him way too tightly, and Baekhyun kind of doesn’t want to know the extent of the damage.

Amongst Chanyeol’s numerous down pillows and what he calls a _duvet_ (it’s a fucking blanket, Baekhyun likes to correct him), Baekhyun lifts his wrist above his face and turns his eyes over the marks, examining them with almost clinical focus. He’s been taking care of all his own injuries since he’d been old enough to get into fights.

He flexes his wrist a little, wincing at the aching bruises blossoming where the guy at the party had grabbed onto him. The pale skin is reddened, and Baekhyun’s got enough experience with injuries to know that it’ll be a particularly nasty shade of purple by the next morning.

“Oh,” Chanyeol sighs, and he looks so upset that Baekhyun already knows he’s thinking himself responsible for the developing bruises. His long guitar-calloused fingers wrap slowly around Baekhyun’s arm, pulling it closer for inspection. Absently, Baekhyun bites the inside of his cheek and wonders why anxiety is clenching around his ribcage. Perhaps it’s the shame of his mistake squeezing its claws around his chest.

The abused skin in bracelets of fingerprints makes Baekhyun think of long healed fingernail scratches against his arms, sharp open-handed slaps across the face, and the coolness of asphalt under his back.

Baekhyun’s had enough shame to last a lifetime.

Chanyeol gently turns his wrist, follows the contusions with his sharp eyes, and then brings Baekhyun’s hand up to his mouth, pressing a fluttery kiss to the vein on the inside of his wrist. And just like that, the shame disappears.

Baekhyun flushes.

Baekhyun knows logically it’s dumb to be so averse to Chanyeol of all people, but he’s spent so much of his life building up careful barriers and walls to protect himself, and Chanyeol has a way of knocking down all the walls like they’re nothing. Chanyeol... Chanyeol’s the fucking love of Baekhyun’s life, but even he wonders sometimes how Chanyeol’s so patient, so careful, so understanding.

Baekhyun swallows the defiance he’s conditioned to shield himself away and then murmurs so softly that Chanyeol actually ducks closer to catch it. “I’m sorry I went back there.”

Chanyeol’s eyes soften even more, if that’s possible. “It’s okay.”

And suddenly, it is okay. In thinking about how much he loves Chanyeol, he almost forgets at times how much Chanyeol reciprocates. It makes his heart hurt on most days, a deep-rooted ache he can’t get enough of. Chanyeol leans in then, presses his soft lips against Baekhyun’s chapped ones, and Baekhyun lets his eyes flutter closed, sinking into the kiss.

Chanyeol tastes like home.

**Author's Note:**

> [my tumblr](http://eatjinsass.tumblr.com) or [twitter](https://twitter.com/whinytaeyong) come hmu


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